6-8-19
Feeling sick and tired of being sick and tired, I decided to reach out to Tamara Smith for the Mental Emotional Release technique. I was in a constant state of going back and forth in my mind of whether I should be in certain relationships and if the transgressions I experienced were real or just me being sensitive. I was so afraid of hurt and disappointment that I was losing sleep replaying and analyzing everything. This ruminating left me feeling fatigued, irritable and worst of all half-assing in all my relationships. In addition, there was a part of me who did not feel comfortable enforcing my boundaries for a fear of coming off as too demanding HA!
Within a few short minutes of my consultation with Tamara, I knew this was the person I needed to work with to experience the sense of well-being and inner peace that I was desperately seeking, I felt as if I had known her for years. We were able to delve into the work the very next day and I was left feeling relieved to have unpacked so much baggage. I also felt very excited and could not wait for session 2. In my second session, I started to release negative emotions, the first one being anger. I had been sitting with anger so long that I felt both drained and nauseous when it was released. A few short minutes later with Tamara’s assistance I released other negative emotions and started to feel more balanced and even a bit lighter. At the end of that process, I felt really good about myself and even bought myself some flowers. It has been a little over a week now and I feel pretty good. In our follow-up session, I was able to get very clear on my values as it pertains to relationships and I recognize that my boundaries are not unreasonable at all. The most fascinating part about going through this process was discovering that the one thing I was saying I didn’t want was the actual thing I wanted the most – commitment.
Thank you, Tamara, my life will never be the same!
Chimere D. Chicago, IL
2-6-18
When I hired Tamara Smith five years ago to become more fit and healthy I had no idea how my entire life was about to completely transform. I was 39 years old. I was in the middle of a separation, felt hopeless, exhausted and had no idea what my future would hold. I was at the tail end of my marriage of ten years, had three daughters at home, two of which were under the age of 10. I realized I had a long hard road ahead of me and had no idea how I was going to do it all alone. I had a house to maintain and young daughters who depended on me emotionally, spiritually and physically.
Initially, our sessions were difficult, I struggled and wondered if I was making any progress, and yet to my surprise, Tamara always kept me on track, consistently reminding me how far I had come, how much strength I had gained, both mentally and physically, and how I was beginning to get my self-confidence back. Through our sessions together, I reminded myself how much strength I had within my mind and my body and each successive session together I found myself more and more empowered. After 20 years at the same job, I chose to seek a higher paying position as a teacher with another district and got the job. With my newfound strength, I decided to take on several remodeling projects with my home to give it a breath of fresh air. I tore up the old carpet and refinished my wood floors, created my own personal Mermaid Lounge in my backyard to enjoy with my girls, redid the stucco and brick siding on my home, painted my bedroom, and completely redid my garage, turning it into a “she-cave” for our family. Some projects I hired out, but the demolition I happily did myself! I am so proud of how far I have come and how hard I worked to be where I am today. I am so excited for all my future endeavors and can’t wait to finally and actually enjoy everything I have accomplished. I would have never been able to do this without the guidance, care, push and love of a wonderful trainer and life coach.
-Gina S., Whittier, CA
Tamara,
9-2-17
Hey!
A few weeks ago I went to the doctor and outside of chronic tendinitis, and being a little overweight I’m pretty healthy for a 43-year-old. My doctor has a new contraption that he is using to body shame people into losing weight, and I took a little joy in the incredulous look on his face when he looked at 1 number: my lean muscle. 70 pounds! You’ve got to know I was nowhere near that when we started. I’m working out 3-4 days per week now, and I’m down 17 pounds since January. It doesn’t sound like much but this morning I put on my Notre Dame t-shirt and I’m swimming in it. I’m embarrassed to wear it. When I met you, I was at the depths of my despair in dealing with the loss of my mother. I was unhealthier and fatter than I’ve ever been. I felt so let down by friends and family who couldn’t even begin to understand what I was going through. My depression was so deep that I literally had to force myself to live through another day in hopes that maybe tomorrow I would find a way out that wasn’t suicide.
I’ve been there before, a few times. At 21 I lost my best friend when she was murdered by her ex-boyfriend. Two days later I lost my cousin who was the equivalent of being my younger brother. I suppose that is when I perfected the art of burying my feelings. It’s also when I discovered that people have a limited capacity to hear about your grief. I carried over these lessons to losing my grandmother and dad within 3 months of one another. Only months after both of those losses I lost my fiancé and unborn child and my previous bad habits in grieving were front and center again. A couple of years ago Kelly and I lost our unborn child and the hopes of having our own kids died right along with him. We were in the middle of caring for my mother so that pain and grief were buried in daily tasks related to her care. I knew the pain of losing my mother was too great to bury. I was also very aware that anyone who has not experienced it would only be able to offer platitudes about grieving my loss. I let them off the hook and had zero expectations about sharing my loss with them. People always think I’m so strong and that I can handle anything simply because they don’t really know me. I can bury anything, that doesn’t make me strong.
Outside of my partner, I felt so alone. Then, I met you. You are the only person I have encountered who didn’t dismiss my grief. You never tired of letting me talk. You understood and could relate because of your own losses. You never squirmed or attempted to change the subject. You listened and shared your own experiences. Seeing you twice a week was like therapy for me. I didn’t realize how much I needed that. More importantly, I needed to experience what it felt like to share my pain with someone without feeling like I’d worn out my welcome. I desperately needed to talk it out with someone without also having to care for them during their grief. It was so powerful to talk about our moms and see how you have come through your losses to the other side. I cannot express what you have come to mean to me. You got me back on track in caring for myself and helped me develop the habits to continue down this path. Eating right and exercising are the very least of what I got out of our time together. I’ve wanted to drop you a line to thank you for everything, but I can never seem to find the right words. This is all coming across very one-sided and all about me. So, let’s just look at the numbers: 17 pounds of fat burned off 70 pounds of lean muscle mass 43 years of heartbreaking losses All countered by 1 trainer You literally helped me save my own life. Thank you.
I think you have a natural ability to help people with their grief. Trust me, I’ve got a lot of long-term friends who don’t, so I know what it looks like. It felt really good to be able to share with someone who didn’t judge me or make me feel weak. It’s a funny thing other people’s expectations. Being expected to be the strong one is a burden I’ve carried for far too long. It really leaves you with no outlet and a fair amount of hostility. I always laugh when people think I’m a pessimist or that I am cynical. Really?!?!? I’m still here. I’m still moving forward. I still think there is plenty to be grateful for, and I’m a pessimist? I sometimes want to unload all of my losses on a person just to see the look of horror in their eyes and then ask, “so do you still think I’m not an optimist?” It’s important what you can do for people like me who are walled off. You should go full force into this field. Not only will it be fulfilling, but I know you can really change people’s lives. See, you didn’t even know you were doing that with me. I don’t think you realized the impact our conversations had on me. They did. You did. I’m grateful for that, otherwise, I might not have found my way out this time.
- Deana G., Whittier, CA